


Lost Cause

by IvaChism



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Feral, Love, Mating Bond, Possessive Behavior, Protectiveness, Romance, Violence, insane
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-08-05
Packaged: 2019-05-29 15:07:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15075782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IvaChism/pseuds/IvaChism
Summary: Jasper is a relic of a lost time. His mind is shattered beyond repair and he is labeled feral, dangerous. A lost cause. Dismissed by all... except one. JxB





	1. Chapter 1

It was a sound that woke him. No, not a sound. A scent? No… he can't quite tell… he can't quite…

It's all over the place. What is? His mind? No, he doesn't know. Or does he? Yes, he does- he's confused.

How long has it been? Minutes? Hours? How does one untouched by time feel its silent passage? Perhaps he should start by opening his eyes…?

Yes. He'll do that.

Darkness. Nothing but darkness. He's blind. Who took his eyes?

He takes a quick breath, a knee-jerk reaction. Mildew… dead things and growing things alike, intertwined as closely as lovers.

His throat feels full… no, his entire skull is full. Of what?

Dirt.

He coughs and chokes, panics when no air fills his lungs, only the cloying earth. He bucks, writhing and rolling and shuddering. He's drowning, drowning, drowning…and suddenly… suddenly he emerges.

As he bursts from the ground, tearing away the hardened earth with fingers curled into claws, he hacks and coughs and doubles over, clearing his body of the thick sludge that had lain stagnant in his body for… minutes, hours, months, he doesn't know. He doesn't know he doesn't know he doesn't…

He breathes his first real breath of air, gasping like a drowned man. He tears at his eyes, dragging away dirt and moss and vines and then there is light, blinding and terrible and as venomous as fire.

It's magnificent.

He's frozen, stiffly staring up into the blue sky. A vulture wheels miles above him. Its golden eyes dismiss him as quickly as they look at him.

Slowly, so so slowly, he crawls from his grave. The wood had rotted away long ago, mere sawdust coating his body.

What happened… no. He can't think right now. He doesn't want to. No.

He takes another breath to calm his raging mind and stills, rigidly silent.

And then he's off, dashing through the forest. Trees fall before him, clipped by his shoulders, and the ground cracks beneath his feet. And then he's falling upon a bobcat, its life ended before it had even registered the danger.

Sweet, sweet liquid flows down his throat, washing away the dirt of his grave. It's the most magnificent feeling he's ever experienced, this amazing meal. He holds the animal closer, buries his face into its fur as he continues to suckle from its torn throat.

So magnificent. Not as good as… no. Don't think about that. No.

When the red stops pouring, he reverently sets the animal aside, though he continues to stroke its fur. So soft… has he ever felt anything quite as fine?

Time passes. He only knows it does because the bobcat's corpse slowly withers away in his hands, carried away by ants and worms and cautious buzzards. When he holds not but bones, he finally stands.

He looks down at himself and feels a mild form of surprise. His uniform lays in tatters off of him, moth-eaten and dirty… god, if the Colonel saw him like this, he'd tan his hide- that stern old man had bucked and gagged men for less.

He runs his hands through his matted hair.

He had to get back to his troops before they labeled him a deserter.

Walking in a circle reveals nothing. He doesn't recognize… anything. These woods are featureless, never-ending.

Is this hell? Did he take a slug to the head and he isn't even aware of it?

But then there's a silhouette in the distance, approaching like a fog.

It's an… angel? No. He-… he doesn't feel right.

His throat feels like it's tearing apart. Has he swallowed a hive of bees? What is happening to him?

The figure hesitates. Her short-cropped hair sways against her chin in the softly-stirring breeze.

She says something… but he doesn't- he doesn't understand?

But…

He feels better when he rips her head from her body. Flinging it away as far as he can, he stumbles away from the creature's twitching body.

He needs to get back to his troops. His troops… he needs to go home. Back to his ma and pa and his baby sister. He needs…

He needs to find his home.


	2. Chapter 2

There are eleven of them, closing in ever nearer, surrounding him.

He'd run for miles upon miles but no matter how fast, they were always just on his peripheral. Not so close as to warrant an attack, but certainly close enough to make their presence known.

He'd turned on his heel at one point, zeroing in on the nearest presence. The stranger had balked, turned and fled in a northerly direction, always out of sight, until finally he'd lost interest. But then the stranger had doubled around, snagged his attention once more, and the chase resumed.

They were luring him, he realized, baiting him to a certain location know only to them. The moment he'd realized this, he'd doubled back. But they'd bundled together, as if able to read his mind, and forced him to continue onto their realized trajectory.

He'd been strong once, he remembers this. Stronger and more ferocious than any other. But this hunger tearing into his throat, digging at his chest, renders him weak. Helpless. Perhaps once upon a time, he'd have eradicated these eleven strangers with ease. But now, on the brink of exhaustion and starvation, all he can do is play right into their little trap.

From arid deserts to grassy plains, they ran him continuously. If he paused even for a moment to hunt, they'd dive forward and force him away from his prey with their approaching presence alone. He knew better than to let them get too close. Just near enough that he could sense them. He'd not even seen the faces of his pursuers yet. Like faceless monsters known only in nightmares, they are unknown to him.

And now, he runs through a forest ripe with life. Herds of deer run rampant, trees intertwined by thick vines and shrubbery that shiver in the cool breeze. Cicadas and grasshoppers rattle throughout the branches, chirruping loudly for all to hear and encompassing it all are thick grey clouds that permit only the barest of sunlight to filter through.

And then he hears it. A stern command issued strictly, hastily. "Now, Emmett!"

A huge man streaks forward, massive arms outstretched.

They collide in a shattering, thunderous sound, kicking up clouds of dirt.

This stranger, this Emmett, is so strong- too strong for him- which becomes apparent when he wraps his massive arms around him and throws him to the ground, pinning him with his own body.

He writhes below Emmett, snarling and snapping his teeth together. The touch of his skin against another's burns. It fills him with such agony, such pain- like acid bubbling within his bones. Too close too close _too close_!

Suddenly, the bear of a man rips himself away, gasping raggedly.

Surging to his feet, his teeth are just inches from tearing into the throat of the incapacitated stranger when yet another force bowls into his side. He's thrown through the air, crashing into multiple trees in a cacophonous booming of sound made all the more sinister by the ragged growls and snarls.

He picks himself up from the rubble, aching like he's never ached before. He's so tired… so hungry. Ravenous.

Through the haze of clearing dirt and falling pine needles, a woman appears, her straight blonde hair whispering in the breeze.

He grits his teeth and stands, willing away the nauseous dizziness that plagues him. Righting himself after stumbling, he steadies his mind and body and flies forward.

Oddly, the woman doesn't move. She stares defiantly, jaw tense. Prepared.

He skids to a stop feet from her, sensing her treachery. Too late though, she's seen his hesitation and is coming to meet him. Before he can feint backward, her hands are wrapped around his neck.

Absolute agony assaults him, a terrible course of electricity burning through his veins. It fries his skin, his mind, his entire body.

It takes all of his will, all of his strength, to tear her claws from him. He resorts to sinking his teeth deep into her throat, ripping and ravaging until her awful, electric touch disappears.

He roars, his mind a rampaging mess. These creatures seek his demise. It is only fair that he return the favor.

As her sweet, beautiful screams fill his ears, he smiles giddily. _This_. This fear permeating from her as she looks up at him from the ground, as she backpedals… he can taste her fright on his tongue… it fills him with such a delicious feeling. A familiar feeling.

And then arms are wrapping around him. His torso, his legs, around his neck, even his eyes. The ten other strangers have rallied together and now render him utterly immobile.

He can't move, he can't breathe- he can hardly think. They're _touching_ him- _him_! Too much too much too much…

He screams. Long and loud and for all he is worth, he screams. He bucks and writhes and claws and tears but they won't stop.

All he wants is to be left alone. Leave him alone, alone!

"Get off of me!" he rages. "Get off!"

He almost begs. Almost. Anything to rid him of this feeling. But he remembers himself at the last moment- he is a major, a soldier of the Confederate army. He does not beg.

"I need you to calm down, Jasper," a man soothes even as he tightens his hold on him.

Jasper? Jasper… Jasper, he does not know who that is- _what_ that is.

"Calm…" the man says again. "I know you're scared. You have been alone for a very long time. But nobody is going to hurt you."

Death, blood, corpses, get off! He rails against them again, resorting to raging and shouting his pain to the sky, howling his fury and terror.

The arms holding him shiver and tremble but they hold true, even tighten.

"His mind is all over the place," a male hisses. "He's raving!"

A brief surge of strength and he manages to free one of his arms. Grabbing one of his assailant's hands, he drags it to his mouth and bites, tearing his teeth into flesh and grinding his teeth together.

A ragged hiss follows and then he's shoved into the cool ground. He snarls, inhaling mouthfuls of dirt with each gasping breath and he remembers his grave. He remembers and it _terrifies_ him.

"He's feral- no better than a beast. No reasoning with him. We need to kill him before he hurts someone else!"

"No! His life has more meaning than you know- than any of us know!"

"Alice, I understand you have visions, but this is not what we were prepared for. Not what you told us would happen. His mind is too far gone, I can see it. He thinks _nothing_ , he only feels. And his memories..."

"Just keep him still. Just a few more minutes. Jasper, I know you don't understand me, I know, but you need to calm yourself."

He wildly rails against them, snapping his jaws together before releasing another roar.

The arms tighten, the bodies press closer and closer and closer and he's burning! He's burning, acid running through his veins- worse than the woman with electricity running from her hands. He screams and roars and cries out and trembles but nothing saves him from this agony, this hell on earth.

He just wants to go home… he just wants to be alone… please, please, leave him alone… get away get away get away.

Finally, a low sob escapes his throat unbidden and slowly, as slowly as the sun sets, he goes limp. His head lowers to his chest and his vision darkens as he falls into the closest thing to sleep a creature such as he can achieve.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is anybody out there?

Bella exits her bathroom in a warm, swirling mist, her towel wrapped neatly around her hair as she fiddles with the strings of her pajama bottoms. School today had been hard. Jessica was her usual catty self and Mike was making puppy eyes at her from across the cafeteria, which of course made Jessica act even more... Jessica.

She hums tunelessly as she hops onto her bed, grabbing a book as she does so and settling deep into her covers. Her aching muscles begin to loosen and relax as she tucks her blankets around her. Sighing softly, she closes her eyes and appreciates the liquid comfort of a steamy shower and soft bedsheets. This is nice…

"Bella."

She lets out a choked scream and simultaneously throws the book she'd been holding and falling from the bed with a soft thump.

Edward retrieves the fallen book from the floor, thinly veiled amusement glittering in his eyes as he watches her prostrate form.

"Edward, you've got to stop doing that," she mutters into the carpet exhaustedly, pausing to yawn widely. That was the second time this week alone.

"I called for you many times," he says as he takes a seat on her bed, looking down at her as she slowly picks herself up. "You must have dozed off."

Bella sighs frustratedly, taking the time to look over her shoulder and give him a sour look. She's tired, dammit, and she doesn't have the patience to deal with this right now.

"What's so important that you need to scare me half to death, then?"

"Can't I come see you for the sake of it?"

"Edward."

He sighs and gestures for her to join him on the bed. His head is lowered, his eyes distant. He seems… off, somehow.

With a fair amount of hesitance, she complies, tucking her feet below her and nervously chewing on her lip. As an afterthought, she grabs her pillow and hugs it to her chest.

"What's wrong?" she asks softly, all previous vestiges of sleep evaporated in the face of Edward's odd graveness. Come to think of it, he'd acted peculiarly yesterday as well. Ever since he'd gotten back from that hunting trip the day previous, he'd been… distant. Distracted. Has she done something wrong? Is he mad at her? He'd only stayed a few minutes to let her know he was back and then he was off again, vanishing into the night.

"I simply came to tell you that… you are not to come to the house under any circumstance. Do you understand?"

"Edward, I-"

"Do you understand?"

There is no reasoning with her boyfriend when he is like this, domineering and forceful, so she nods slowly albeit dubiously. "And Emmett and Alice? How will I see them if-"

"You'll see them at school. That should be enough."

Her anger surges again but she tamps it down. He's obviously worried about something.

"What is this about?"

"It's…" he rubs his arm and shrugs feebly, "hard to explain."

Well, that sure helped.

His eyes grow distant as he continues to rub his arm.

"I'm sure I can understand," she declares. "We have all night."

"Bella," he sighs exasperatedly.

"Edward," she says in the same voice.

He shakes his head and continues to rub his arm.

"What is wrong?" she demands, reaching out and grabbing his arm. He tenses below her touch, readying to jerk away, but she tightens her hold, glaring sternly.

When he finally stills, she peels back the long sleeve of his shirt and gasps, slapping a hand to her mouth.

"What happened?" she whispers, taking in the sight of mangled flesh knitted roughly together in the vague shape of teeth. "Who bit you?"

"It's nothing-"

"Edward," she growls, releasing him when he pulls away. "I know you think you can protect me from anything. I know you'd do anything for me. But that goes both ways, you know? To know that someone hurt you and not even know who did it…" she shakes her head. "This is a relationship. Things are a two-way street around here."

He's quiet for a moment, clearly debating the best course of action. Finally, he drops his head.

"It was a feral. Got his hands on me before I could stop him."

"A feral?"

"A vampire who's lost their humanity. We were tracking him because Alice," here he shakes his head and makes a disgusted face, "Alice had another one of her visions." He says it with such distaste that even Bella feels discomfort.

"During the hunting trip," she realizes, nodding understandingly and waiting patiently for him to continue.

"She said he was destined for something great."

"And that is?"

He bares his teeth and shrugs viciously. "That's the thing- she won't tell me, won't tell any of us. I can't even find it in her mind. She just keeps repeating that he's here for something greater."

"And he's at the house," she surmises. "Is he dangerous?"

He nods, wraps his arm around her and drags her close to his side like a child reaching for a teddy bear. "Some of the things I've seen in his mind…" he shivers against her. "It's utterly foul. He'd drain you as soon as look at you."

She frowns. Why would Alice keep such a dangerous vampire around? Her visions have been wrong before. Why would she put such faith in the feral?

"What's his opinion on the matter?"

"He doesn't have one. Feral, remember? No lucid thoughts beyond basic stuff; hunger, boredom. Things like that. He's no better than a person in a coma."

"How awful," she whispers. "That poor man, trapped in his own mind. What could have happened to him?" Do vampires get PTSD? Shellshock? It would make sense- eternal creatures exposed to all manner of evil, of course they'd not come away unscathed.

"Don't feel sorry for him, Bella. He's killed many… hundreds, even. If he has a soul, it is as dark as night."

She nods for appearance's sake, but she can't help herself in pitying him. That is a fate worse than death, to live without living. And for eternity, for that matter.

"I'll come tomorrow night," he murmurs, "I've got to get back now. The Denali coven is here, helping us to keep him subdued. They'll need my help."

"Be safe," she mutters, smiling tiredly as he bends to kiss her cheek.

Before he departs, he turns and points at her. "No coming to the house. Understood?"

Her earlier annoyance rises and before she gets angry and starts an argument, she turns her back to him as she settles into her bed.

A soft chuckle sounds and then he's gone, a gentle 'Goodnight, Bella,' echoing in the sudden silence.


	4. Chapter 4

He stretches slowly, opening and closing his fingers and flexing his neck. When the tension leaves, he settles back into his chains, allowing them to take his weight.

It's dark here. So dark that not even his superior eyesight can pierce the room. A room, yes, he knows he's in a room. But where? He hardly has an idea, only that it smells of mildew and rot.

He tenses again, moving his legs so they stretch out in front of him. He's oddly bound, thick iron linked together and wrapped around his wrists and ankles. He'd tried, he'd tried so hard. But they proved too strong for him to escape. He'd snarled and howled and shouted, yet no one came for him.

So he's quiet, as silent as the room he's in, breathing shallowly through his nose.

How long has it been? Has it been as long as he was underneath? No, he doubts it. But how long? He doesn't know. He doesn't know…this is truly hell.

A door opens suddenly, the flick of a lock hurting his sensitive hearing. Light floods into the opening, burning his eyes.

He begins to panic when footsteps approach him, closer and closer. He snarls weakly, then adds more power to it as the stranger continues forward, choosing to not heed his warnings.

He jerks against his bindings, baring his teeth wildly.

When the stranger grabs his arm, he lunges. They jump backward and make a chastising noise, and then their hands are back on him. No matter how loud he becomes or how ferociously he snaps at them, they continue to fidget with the chains around him.

And then… and then their iron weight suddenly drops from him, clattering to the ground in a sinister pile.

As he leans down to inspect the links, he suddenly realizes the stranger is no longer here. Where did they go? How could they leave without his noticing?

He swallows his growls and snarls, taming them to a muted rumbling that vibrates his chest.

Wearily, he slinks towards the door still hanging open and peeks outside hesitantly. Nothing but an ordinary house made of immense windows and fine furniture. It makes him nervous to be around such finery. What if he were to break something?

As slowly and gently as he can, he creeps through the house, swallowing against the dryness in his throat and itching at the odd clothes they'd forced onto him.

His captors had neglected him any food- to keep him weak, he's sure. And now he feels that weakness in the very way his steps tax him so and in the faint dimming of his vision. It's unsettling.

Following his nose, he creeps to the door. Beyond, he can smell the forest. Pine trees and sap and growing things, and he takes a moment to appreciate the medley filling his lungs.

With the care he would afford a newborn babe, he gently presses down on the hinge until the door slowly creaks open. Releasing a breath he'd unknowingly been holding, he creeps outside. For a moment, he simply enjoys the soft breeze curling through his untamed hair. The leaves shuddering in the breeze fill his ears, as does the distant sound of deer and birds and foraging bears.

He'd spent so long in the darkness… far too long.

But then the breeze brings with it something foreign and yet familiar. Something at once soothing and exciting, intoxicating and startlingly refreshing. He takes deep gulps of the scent, closing his eyes to appreciate this strange new smell. It makes him shiver and tremble. He's never come across anything quite like it and yet he's known it his entire life… it was… it is…

Home.

___---___---___

Bella pattered across the kitchen, rising to her tiptoes to grab a plate from the cabinet.

A soothing song played from her phone and she gently sang along, not bothering to cringe at her atrocious voice when nobody is around to hear it.

The smell of something burning makes her turn around and let out a rushed curse as she sees the eggs in the pan begin to let off a black smoke.

"Crap, crap, crap," she mutters as she hurries them to the sink and, after a moment of deliberation, douses the mess in water. She sets it into the sink and runs a hand through her hair. So much for dinner…

The song is interrupted by the ringing of her phone.

"Hey, Angela," she rushes to greet her friend, swiping her hair out of her eyes.

"Bella? Are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just finished burning my dinner is all." She turns back to eye the still sizzling pan in the sink. She doesn't know what is up with her lately, but her mind is everywhere but present.

"Ah, hope I didn't cause that. I can call back?"

"No, no. I just let my mind wander. Eggs were never my forte."

"Bella," she sounds disappointed. "Breakfast for dinner again? What would Charlie think?"

"He doesn't get to think anything unless he wants to get in here and do the cooking himself."

Angela chuckles. "I take it you're on your own tonight?"

Bella tucks the phone between her shoulder and ear and sets to cleaning her mess, wetting a rag and wiping down the spattered counters "Yeah, Charlie's working overtime again. Probably won't be back 'till morning."

"Well, if you want, we can have a sleepover? I just popped some popcorn, got a movie loaded up."

"That… that actually sounds really nice." A chance to get out of her recently stifling house sounded like it would do her wonders. Maybe even restore her cooking skills.

"Awesome! Well, come on over. I'll try not to eat all the popcorn."

Bella shares in the laugh and hangs up, smiling absentmindedly as she gets to work running a soapy sponge across the pan.

Humming, she dances across the kitchen to replace the pots and pans. And as she whirls back around in an awful parody of what she'd been taught in ballet class, she stumbles right into a warm, hard chest.

At first, she thinks its Edward. But then… he isn't warm. Charlie? No, her father wouldn't sneak up on her like this.

Horror-movie slow, she turns and looks over her shoulder.

The scream catches in her throat, coming out more as an awful groan as she stumbles away from the stranger in her kitchen. He's unmoving, unnaturally so, staring down at her from a significant height difference. What. The. Hell.

He's not moving, is he even breathing? How long has she been thinking? Minutes? Sure feels like it.

And then logic picks up its megaphone and screams right into her mind, 'RUN!' And who is she to disobey her logic?

Sparing a moment to feint left and right, appearing quite stupid if she had her mind about her, she sprints towards the door.

But he's there, right in front of her. Ok. A vampire then. Of course it is. That tiny voice of logic goes limp, shakes its head and declares her a dead girl walking. Thanks, logic.

She retreats, shaking her head, then wheels on her heel and heads towards the stairs. Again, he's right in front of her.

Oh, god. She's dead, isn't she? After just learning about the supernatural world and the distant possibility that she might one day join it with Edward at her side, she gets taken out by a strange vampire. Wonderful. Just great.

Ok, panicking won't help. Deep breaths, Bella. Deep breaths. She inhales like her life depends on it then releases it in a great whoosh. There we go, nice and even.

But the moment the man begins to creep towards her, no, more like stalk towards her, those calm breaths turn into hyperventilating pants.

"Ok, ok, hi? Hello?"

He pauses mid-step, wavering.

She sucks down more air and swallows loudly. "Um… m-my name is Bella. A-and you're on Cullen territory, ok? If you hurt me, they'll kill you."

He's silent, merely staring at her, expression unyielding.

"There's a lot of them," she declares as she slowly backs up into the kitchen. "Strong, too. So, if you could just…" without her permission, her voice grows small, "leave." Stumbling as she backs into a chair, she numbly falls into it, distantly realizing that she's shaking.

The stranger seems to waver, uncertain and curious, although how she knows this is beyond her- after all, his expression reveals nothing.

In the silence that follows, she manages to bring her breathing back to a relatively normal rhythm.

And then, as slowly as the sun itself when it sets, he moves into the kitchen, making it feel smaller than it ever has before. He comes closer and closer and she's positive he's about to take a bite out of her when he passes her in favor of the chair beyond. It squeals as it's dragged across the wooden floor and then he's taking a seat, settling himself gently into it. Almost as an after-thought, he crosses his arms across his chest, then thinks better of it and settles them stiffly against the table.

O…k….

She holds his gaze in disbelief before remembering all she'd learned from Edward. Vampires are more animalistic than a human, right? Would this one take it as a challenge if she looked into his eyes? She slowly focuses on the ground right in front of her, only occasionally darting glances up at him.

A stalemate, then…

As she worries her lip and holds herself as rigidly as possible, she takes the time to inspect him.

Long, dirty blonde hair hang in gentle waves, resting against his chin in a careless cascade. And his eyes- they're blacker than black, a near endless void. Like the rest of the Cullen coven, he's alabaster pale, as if carved from granite, and unnaturally handsome. Any girl could fall for him, but she can see it in his eyes, that pacing predator just waiting to strike. A thought occurs to her. This… this is the feral, isn't it? The one Edward mentioned? Oh god…

She shivers and raises her legs onto the chair, wrapping her arms around her knees and hugging them to her chest.

But…

He's not doing anything. Just staring. Why isn't he ripping her limb from limb? 'Draining her', as Edward had mentioned? He certainly doesn't act like she'd expected a feral would. No frothing at the mouth, no incoherent mutterings. No, he's simply sitting across from her.

The feral suddenly moves, repositioning his legs in front of him and wrapping his arms around them. A near perfect mirror of her own position.

Eternal minutes pass and she can't help but feel like a fawn in the claws of a lion. She'd watched videos online, where the predator seemed to become confused, somehow taking the fawn as its own. But then, inexorably, the fawn always died, either at the lion's careless hands or by stress and malnourishment.

Is that what this is? A confused predator?

The feral moves again, resting his chin against his upraised knees as if he were exhausted.

Can vampires even get tired?

As she breathes slowly, purposefully, she realizes there's an echo. He's mimicking her, evidenced by the gentle rise and fall of his chest. On a whim, she holds her breath. The soft puffs of air cease as quickly as her own.

Unable to help it, a brief spark of strained amusement makes her giggle.

He tilts his head subtly, hair falling into his eyes, but doesn't move beyond that.

"I'm sorry," she says, waving her hand dismissively. "This is just…" Insane? Unbelievable? Surreal? She can't quite place the thought.

Why is she so calm? Perhaps because she's been staring into the maws of death for a seeming eternity and they've yet to close on her. She spares a quick glance around the kitchen, spotting her phone just feet from her. She'll have to lean across the table to get it but she'll simply have to do it. She can't simply sit here and wait for him to get hungry… or hungrier.

She slowly unwinds her arms and, as if reaching for a wild animal, leans forward. Pausing, she glances towards him. He's unmoving, though his black eyes seem more lucid, present. Focusing back on the phone, she slowly curls her fingers around it and, once it is safely in her grip, drags it to her chest.

Trembling, she looks between him and the screen hastily as she enters Edward's number. Her thumb is just about to press down on the dial button when she inexplicably pauses.

He's… staring intensely at the microwave and its blinking, neon green timer. If she hadn't been watching him so closely, she would have missed the way his arms tightened further around himself. As if waking from a stupor, he looks around the kitchen in a growing franticness, from the fridge to the sink and the air-conditioning vent sputtering from the ceiling.

It's a surprise from the previous, inanimate creature to this suddenly sporadic, twitching man. With a start, she realizes his eyes have lightened considerably, though are still a dark black.

He suddenly leaps to his feet, the chair smashing across the room, and then he's leaving the kitchen in quick strides like a man on a mission.

Bella is dumb-struck, left at the table with her mouth agape. A crash sounds from the living room and she spares one last glance at the number on her phone before closing it and shoving it into her pocket.

Slowly, she creeps to the kitchen doorway and hesitantly looks into the living room.

Like the kitchen, he's looking every which way, from the t.v. to the sofa to the lamp with the most confounded expression she's ever seen a vampire make.

She whispers, for anything above a hush sounds wrong in the quiet house. "Are you… alright?"

Yes, Bella, ask the feral vampire if he's ok. Good idea. Remind me again, why we're not calling Edward and every other damn vampire we know right now?

He'd whipped around at her words as if he'd forgotten she was there.

His head begins to shake as if unbelieving of his circumstances. And then his hands are rising and gripping his tangled locks and pulling on them fiercely. As he hunches into himself, a sound escapes him, one almost too quiet for her ears. But she had heard it. A stifled, barely there sob.

It pulls on her heart strings like nothing else ever has. If she didn't know his true nature, if he weren't a stranger, she'd have already enveloped him into a hug. But he's yet to make a threatening move…

He seems only… scared. Confused. Lost.

"Hey," she whispers, taking a step forward and pausing. "I can see you're afraid- it's ok. It's alright… Hey."

He continues to tremble, his entire body shivering and rattling.

It breaks her heart to see. She'd only ever seen one thing similar, and it was those damned ASPCA commercials with the trembling dogs and cats and their sad, sad eyes. The very same commercials that had her bawling like a baby whenever they aired. At once it feels both wrong and completely right to compare him to an abused animal.

Swallowing her fear and, admittedly her logic, she approaches ever closer to the hungry, scared apex predator.

"I, um… when I was younger and I became afraid, I used to hug my mom or dad. And they'd let me, for as long as I wanted. And it always made me feel better." She chews on her lip. "I could…" she feels foolish even thinking it, so she swallows down the words before they leave her mouth. Of course the vampire doesn't want a hug from you, stupid! And why would you want to hug him in the first place? Darwinism is certainly in play, huh Bella?

Lost in her thoughts, she doesn't have time to notice as he crosses the distance between them in a flash.

He hesitates just inches from her. His eyes flit between her own uncertainly, his distrust plain to see.

She gasps softly, flinching with a soft, 'oh' at the utter speed he'd displayed.

He's just… standing there. Waiting for her?

"Is this ok?" she asks, slowly reaching out her hand between them. His gaze drops to her hand, zeroing in on it with such intensity that she swallows loudly.

It feels like she's reaching into the mouth of a crocodile.

No. No, she's helping a scared and confused man in the only way she knows how.

The moment her fingers touch his chest, they both inhale softly. As if that one touch opened the floodgates, he's suddenly moving even closer. His chest presses into her own and his chin drops onto her shoulder. Reorienting herself, she raises her arms and ever so slowly lets the come to rest across his broad shoulders.

As she allows his shaking to envelop them both, she realizes he's warm. Comfortable. She shushes him again and slowly begins running her hands up and down his back.

Through the thin, long sleeved Henley he wears, she can feel his ribs, one by one. What happened to him? Was he being fed? Could vampires starve to death?

Bella freezes when his nose suddenly finds the dip of her shoulder, burying into the crevasse and staying there stubbornly. His chest expands against her own as he inhales her scent and she unconsciously tenses, preparing for the bite.

But it never comes. What comes instead are his arms, raising to wrap around her, pulling her even closer- something she hadn't thought possible.

Unwarranted, a blush rises to her cheeks as his scent fills her nose- a pleasing yet gentle combination of fresh rainwater and mesquite. This is… intimate. Far more intimate than she and Edward had ever reached. She'd only ever held hands with him, and the spare few kisses against her cheeks. But this… felt a thousand times different. Deeper, almost. Far closer.

One of her hands raises and, after a brief hesitation, wraps around the back of his neck and kneads softly.

The reaction is immediate. He melts against her like a cat, seemingly forgetting his considerable weight as he pushes her to her knees, collapsing right along with her.

He nuzzles her again, holds her tighter, his knees outlining her own.

"There," she whispers. "Everything's alright…"

He's so warm, yet still he shivers.

She reaches out to the couch and grabs the blanket thrown around the back of it.

Dragging it towards them, she settles it around them both like a fussing mother, tucking it into every crease and worrying over it until it's just right.

She takes the stranger into her arms once more, contemplating that she doesn't even know his name.

What an odd turn her night has taken…

Damn, she forgot about Angela. Taking out her phone, she quickly texts a brief explanation then returns it to her pocket.

As she resumes kneading the back of his neck, she chances a conversation. As softly as she can, she asks, "What is your name?"

He doesn't move against her, doesn't give any sign at all that he heard her.

"Do you know where you are? ... Do you know who you are?"

Nothing.

Although it is clear he isn't as feral as the meaning of the word would suggest, he certainly isn't normal. No, there's something not quite right about him. This ping-ponging between emotions, the clear confusion… it all spoke to a mental chaos that made her shudder to consider. What would it take to break a vampire's mind? Something horrendous, surely.

She hugs him tighter at the thought. Bella had always considered herself a rather loner, non-touchy-feely type individual. But this man is quickly proving her wrong. She wants nothing more than to wrap him up in a hundred blankets and to fix his fractured mind with the snap of a finger.

But it doesn't work like that, she knows. Nothing could ever be so easy.

No, she can't fix him. But she can certainly hold onto him, and she'll do so for as long as he'll allow, and hopefully, hopefully, he'll feel better for it.

So strange that she's so devoted to this man, a stranger who wandered into her house. But there's something that lures her closer to him, makes her want to protect him, to be close. And for now, she won't fight it.

Bella tightens her hold on him. "I'm right here."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I mainly post on FFN if that's more your style- come visit me ;)

Warmth. Comfort. Peace.

Home.

This is it. Home- he knows it.

From her soft cooing to her intoxicating scent, this gentle creature holding him is… what is she? His? His what? He doesn't know.

All he knows, what little of it that there is, is that she brings his wild, untamable mind to rest- and that must make her important, whatever she is.

When she falls limp against him, he holds her even closer. Pressing his cheek against her own, he wonders if it would be alright if he just… would she mind? Of course she would… wouldn't she? Does she? Does she even know? Of the blood… death… screams and crying and pleas for mercy and the blood the blood the blood-

Would she mind?

Ever so gently, he maneuvers her so that she rests fully against him. With one arm cradling her against him, he slowly raises his hand before hesitating. She'd be angry, just like the other one. But what if she isn't?

She certainly doesn't smell like the other. Not of blood, but of a flower. Not of rage and terror-inducing, mind-numbing fury, but of fresh rainwater and a gentle breeze.

She wouldn't mind.

Closing his eyes and bracing himself for her rage, for the pain, he ever so slowly threads his fingers through her hair.

She doesn't snarl. She doesn't bite or growl or tear her claws into him…

Instead, this gentle girl sighs softly and burrows even closer to him, grabbing loose fistfuls of his shirt.

What a marvel, this girl.

He is delightfully surprised to discover that her hair is like silk. Soft and wavy and cascading through his fingers as he, for all intents and purposes, pets her.

He imagines he could continue on for the rest of the night, for as long as she'd allow him. But the man standing at the doorway seems displeased and, for the moment, he halts his ministrations.

The man snarls and growls… just like she used to. This stranger radiates with fury, trembles with it.

Just like her just like her just like her would he hurt her?

Slowly, he turns so his body is between this girl and the male.

Unbidden, his lips peel back from his teeth and he finds a primal, animalistic sounds ripping from his throat.

____-----____----____

The soft pressure that had been cradling her before begins to increase. It tightens and tightens to the point that she can't breathe.

Waking with a gasp, Bella struggles instinctively against the force crushing the breath from her lungs.

"Bella, stop!"

Edward? He sounds so frightened, so worried.

Terror floods her veins, for what could make a vampire scared? So she stops struggling, even though she can't breathe, and forces herself to take in the scene around her.

It's the stranger from before. Had she fallen asleep against him? He has her face pressed against his neck, hiding her from Edward's sight. He looks… utterly ferocious, animalistic, with his face creased in fury and his teeth on full display, eyes black as night.

Her lungs are quivering now, begging for oxygen. She tries to raise her arms but they are crushed between her body and his.

This man… no, he's more animal than man. Shouldn't she reason with him as such?

Forcing herself to go limp in his grasp, she does the only thing she is capable of. Clearing her mind of the panic, she whimpers so softly that a human wouldn't have heard.

But he is no human, and his eyes immediately flicker towards her own. Though he doesn't tear his gaze from presumably Edward, his grasp loosens instantaneously.

She sucks in lungful after lungful of air, tears forming in the corners of her eyes as her throat stings ferociously.

"Edward?" she whispers hoarsely.

"Don't struggle or he'll attack. Just be calm, Bella."

"What do I do?" she whispers, being mindful of not allowing her fear to tense her muscles. Gone is the quiet, gentle man. In his place is a snarling vampire. A feral.

His growls vibrate against her, makes her body radiate with his own energy.

"Bella."

She nearly sobs when she hears Carlisle's soft, self-assured voice. He's beside Edward, one of his hands raised in supplementation.

"You need to be calm; we'll get you out of this. Just be calm. Jasper? Jasper, can you understand me?"

Who is Jasper?

Carlisle continues. "Jasper, I know it's hard. Nothing makes sense right now, but you have to let go of Bella. She's just a human, your strength is too much for her. You could kill her."

Jasper must be the man holding her, then. Distantly, she thinks it suits him. Though now is not the time to be thinking of things so trivial… But then again, now that her earlier wake-up scare is fading, she finds that with each slow breath, she calms more and more.

"Carlisle?" she whispers, reluctant to raise her voice.

"We're right here, Bella."

"I… I think it's best if you and Edward leave the house."

"Like hell-" Edward snarls, though he is immediately interrupted by the ferocious roar that comes from Jasper.

It takes a moment to unscramble her brain from the nearly concussive sound, realizing she'd gone utterly limp during it all. So long had she been around vampires with near perfect control that she'd been lulled into a complacency around them. She'd forgotten of their fearsome strength, of the fact that they could break her in two with just one arm. It should terrify her. It really should.

"Jasper," she murmurs, and it was as if a light switch had been flipped. He quiets and drops his head though maintains a steady stare-down on the other two vampires.

"See?" she says in just as quiet a voice. "He's calm around me. I think he trusts me- he knows I can't hurt him. You two need to leave- he'll settle down without two threats staring him down."

Carlisle is obviously hesitant in his reply. "I don't think that's our best course of action…"

"There is absolutely no way we are leaving you here with it," Edward cuts in, though this time he is more mindful of his voice.

"Do you have a better idea?" she challenges. Jasper readjusts his grip on her, his fingers flexing against her. Almost instinctively, she drops her head against his neck and sighs, letting her breath ghost across his skin. "Please, Edward."

The silence that follows suggests a conversation carried on, too low and fast for her human ears to register.

Carlisle speaks again, his voice just as smooth and precise as before. The voice of a doctor, a man in control. "Alright, Bella. Alice is outside. She says it will work. Once we leave, you are to do whatever it takes to get him to let go of you. Do you understand?"

"Yes," she nods against Jasper.

"I'm right outside, Bella," Edward reminds her.

She closes her eyes as the only two capable of saving her leave the house.

"Jasper," she murmurs into the utter silence, opening her eyes once more to stare up at him. His face has relaxed, though he still stares at the closed door with an intensity that makes her swallow. "Jasper," she tries again.

This time, he does look down. His eyes are still black, still creased in worry.

"It's ok…" she soothes, struggling to make enough room so that she might raise her hand. He seems reluctant of the distance, however, and makes sure that there isn't even a millimeter between their chests.

Her voice drops to convey how utterly serious she means her next words. "I won't let them hurt you," she promises soberly. "They won't lay a hand on you." What right does she have to make such empty promises? A human promising to protect a vampire? It's almost laughable. But she means it with every fiber of her being.

His eyes are so somber that her heart aches. What has this man been through to have such sad eyes? It makes her want to wrap him up and hide him away. But for now, they must address the coven anxiously waiting for her outside.

"You need to let me go," she murmurs, beginning to struggle lightly.

A crease forms between his brow and she can't help but wonder how much he truly understands. Is he beyond all form of basic human speech?

"Jasper," she says, louder this time.

He jerks against her, his eyes snapping to her lips and back up to her eyes. "You need to let me go."

"Go?"

His voice. It's like drizzled honey, smooth and low and intoxicating. She shivers in his grips, feels an embarrassing twinge in her lower stomach, made all the more embarrassing by the quiver of his nose and the widening of his pupils. Gods… can he… can he smell her?

Mortified, she begins her struggle anew and he immediately lets her go as if touching her burnt him, leaving her sprawled along the floor.

She watches as he backs away, behaving as if she is the creature capable of tearing him limb from limb.

All of a sudden, a blur shoots forth from the corner of her vision. A chorus of ferocious, blood-chilling noises follow, then she is left in the living room all alone.

…what the hell?

\----____----____

Grabbing the feral by his neck, Edward hauls him out of the door before he can lay one more hand on his Bella.

This creature. It was time to end it. Alice had her fun, but it was time to stop trusting in her little visions and start acting.

His hands are on either side of the feral's head when it contorts its body, hunching into itself and bucking Edward from it like a bull. Edward lands on his feet a long distance away and roars his challenge.

The feral responds in kind but is cut short when Emmett suddenly grabs it, wrapping both arms around its neck in a sleeper hold.

It bucks and screeches and roars but, in such a weak state, it has no chance of upending their strongest member.

"Time to calm down, buddy," Emmett growls.

Sudden flashes of bloodied corpses, thousands in number, each with frozen faces of terror. The visions are enough to make Edward fall to his knees.

"Edward?" Carlisle asks, hesitating between the struggling feral and his disturbed son.

"Get that thing away from me," Edward snarls, holding his head. "Its mind is the foulest thing I've ever witnessed." He pauses to gag. "There's no good left in it. End it, Emmett!" he demands. "End it!"

Alice's scent invades his nose as she comes close, wrapping her arm around his shoulders as he trembles. "Edward-" she tries to say, but he shoves her away.

"Get off! Emmett!"

The feral is going berserk, twisting and writhing and trying every trick in the book to get away.

It finally resorts to yelling, as it had in the woods.

"Get off!" it screams. "Get off, get off, get off!" If their kind could cry, he'd imagine the feral would be sobbing. Never had he seen one so far gone as this. It was saddening in a way. But more than anything, it sickened him. Edward wanted it gone from his sight, and as far away from Bella as possible. Just the image of it curled around her vulnerable, delicate form… he shudders.

And then she appears, like an angel of fury. Her brunette locks whip behind her as she stumbles outside, her expression nearly as thunderous as the feral's. "What the hell are you doing to him?" she demands, rushing toward Emmett as if she had the strength to break his hold.

Edward grabs her before she gets too close, hauling her back.

If possible, the feral goes even more berserk, managing to whip around and dig his fangs into Emmett's arm. "Fuck," he hisses. "Rose." She's by his side in an instant, attempting to subdue the creature. It takes both Alice and Carlisle to keep it in hand.

Bella herself is throwing a fit in his arms. "Can't you see you're hurting him?!" she demands, snarling as pathetically as a kitten. He would have laughed if her safety wasn't at stake.

"Bella, love. We need to go inside."

"He's scared," she yells ferociously, as alive as he'd ever seen the normally timid girl. "He's just scared. Carlisle! Alice, please." But already they are hauling the enraged feral away, back into the woods and to their house. "Please," she whispers as they vanish from her sight without a hint to suggest they'd been there in the first place. Tears beginning to cascade down her cheeks.

It hurts him to see her so sad. And over that creature, no less. He pulls her inside despite her struggles and protests and forces her head under his chin as he wraps her in a hug and inhales her delectable, mouth-watering scent.

She trembles against him and he realizes she is still crying, now sobbing silently.

"He's just scared," she whispers. "He's just scared."


	6. Chapter 6

What else are you waiting for? For the entire town to be slaughtered?"

"Edward, please."

"No! I don't understand why we're keeping this, this creature! Why are we endangering the lives of everyone around us? Bella's life?"

"Because it's the right thing to do. And Bella is still alive and well. For him to withhold his hunger around a human… either his control is absolutely remarkable or this is something else entirely. The fact that she wasn't torn to pieces the moment he caught her scent-"

"Enough!" Edward snarled. He got into Carlisle's face, raising his finger and jabbing it into the air. "If that thing escapes again, I don't care how much you want to save it, I will personally see to its destruction- do you understand?"

Carlisle stiffened, his face going hard as marble in the face of his 'son's' challenge.

"He is very sick," the doctor said instead.

Edward bared his teeth and began to pace across their elegant kitchen, too fast for a human to track. "Bella is not to come anywhere near here. If any of you allow her inside, you will deal with me personally."

From upstairs, Emmett's snort was barely covered by Rose's amused shushing.

Glaring, Edward turned and stormed from the house, the faintest sounds of chains rattling echoed from the basement and only fueled his rage further.

***

"Bella."

Bella couldn't get his scent off of her mind. Rainwater and mesquite- the most pleasing, gentle combination she'd ever had the fortune of experiencing.

And the way he'd snarled so ferociously- among such perceptive creatures as a vampire, surely she hadn't been the only one to notice that it wasn't anger driving him, but rather fear? Surely…

But they'd been so rough with him, treating him like an animal, the people she'd hesitantly begun to call family. Ever gentle, reliable Carlisle, sweet Alice, her boyfriend… they'd turned into utter strangers yesterday night.

God, he'd been so skinny, so malnourished. Were they feeding him? Were they-

"Bella!"

Bella jerked, her books tumbling from her locker to clatter onto the ground.

"Jesus, sorry." Mike bent down and began to straighten her books into his arms, red flushing into his cheeks.

"No, that was my bad." She accepted her disorganized books with a polite, albeit strained smile and shoved them back into her locker, shutting it with a click and turning back to the teenage boy.

"I was, uh, calling your name for a while."

"Sorry, didn't get much sleep last night." She shifted her backpack and shifted from foot to foot. "Is there something you wanted…?"

"Oh, right," he chuckled, flustered. She wished he'd give up on his little crush. It made her uncomfortable, almost like she was doing something wrong. She wasn't unintentionally leading him on, was she? She hoped not…

She was already making her way out to the parking lot, eager to head home after a mind-numbing day of lectures- not that she'd heard even half of them, too preoccupied with thoughts of her brief, cuddly visitor. Mike trotted at her side like an eager puppy.

"Uh, me and Jess and the rest of the gang are gonna go out to the movies. Did you wanna go?"

"Probably not," she muttered, her mood dropping at the sight of the man leaning against her truck. "I'll talk to you later, ok? Thanks for the invite," she waved at Mike.

"Right, yeah. See you."

Edward's crossed arms made him look like a petulant teenager, the somber glare only adding to the effect. "Is he still pestering you?"

She ignored him, fishing her keys from her pocket and pointedly staring at his chest, willing him to move. She did not have the energy to deal with this right now…

His jaw tightened. "I'm not sure it's safe for you to be driving when you're being so emotional."

Before she could snarl out her frustrations at him, her keys were snatched from her hand in the blink of an eye. Gaping, she watched as her boyfriend smugly opened her truck and sat himself into the driver's seat.

No way…

She gripped the air in front of her, gaping speechlessly for a moment as the frustration swept through her veins like a tidal wave, building in her before cresting into a barely restrained shriek.

Turning on her heel, she walked quickly away. No way was she going to get into that truck with him- absolutely no way. How dare he?

A hand pulled on her arm, nearly wrenching her backwards.

Utilizing the tug to her advantage, she whirled around and threw her hand into his stupidly perfect cheek.

He didn't even flinch, even as she gasped and doubled over her throbbing hand.

"Bella," he simpered. "You're only proving my point."

"Damnit, Edward," she hissed.

"Where were you going?"

"I'm walking home."

"You're acting irrationally-"

"Don't even start with me," she snarled, standing up straight and pretending her hand wasn't throbbing in pain.

Edward looked around the parking lot then down at her disapprovingly. "The children are staring."

"Where is he?" she whispered heatedly, knowing he'd hear her.

"Who?"

"Edward…" she began, her voice breaking as her fury closed her throat. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been so angry… aside from last night, when he'd hauled her away from Jasper and into her room against her will.

It was too much, him doting on her and dictating her will as if she were a doll to be played with. Edward used his strength against her, knowing she had little say in the matter.

And she was fed up.

"Where is he?" she asked again, stressing each word.

Edward looked mortified- good, he should. His delicate little girlfriend had never behaved this way before.

"If you're speaking of the feral-"

"Jasper."

"The feral," he said again, topaz eyes growing darker. "Then it is kept securely away from the rest of society. It won't be coming anywhere near you again, you need not worry."

"I'm not worried for myself," she declared, drawing back. Who was this man standing in front of her? Had he always been such a stranger? "I'm worried for him. For Jasper. Are you even feeding him? He was so weak… I could feel every bone in his back."

Edward huffed and crossed his arms again. He looked as if he were about to deny her but then he finally relented. "We are keeping him weak so as to make him more manageable. If he was at his full strength, there'd be a massacre. We wouldn't be able to stop him as easily."

"So, what, you're just going to watch him starve?"

"If I had my way, yes. But," he sniffed, "Carlisle thinks he'll be able to reason with it. Make it come to terms with its past- save it from its madness."

"That's… that's the most idiotic thing I've ever heard," Bella murmured, raising a hand to cover her mouth as tears threatened to leave her.

Edward smirked slowly. "I agree-"

"There's no way to reason with a starving man. Let alone one on the brink of death. Carlisle's only committing cruelty…"

Edward's eyes darkened further. "I think it's time we head home. You've obviously not gotten enough sleep."

He reached forward and grabbed her arm, pulling her towards the truck.

But Bella was distracted with thoughts of the gentle, sweetly-scented male. He was withering away and the Cullens were content with watching him turn into a pile of bones… She'd seen it, when he was standing across from her, looking into her eyes for both reassurance and acceptance, silently seeking her comfort- he was a good person. Simply… lost.

She had to do something. But what?

The click of the door handle brought her out of her stupor and with a jerk she realized Edward was herding her into the passenger seat.

"No," she startled, pushing back and refusing to move another foot.

"Bella, please. You're being ridiculous."

"No, Edward," she said again, pushing back against him when he nudged her forward another step.

"Bella."

"No!" she screamed.

The ambient sound of chattering students leaving the school for the day stopped as they all turned to watch the fighting couple.

Using the attention to her advantage, she squirmed against his hold and yelled again. "Let me go!"

Edward, with no other option, immediately let her go and took a step back, raising his hands.

Tossing her hair over her shoulder and straightening her backpack, she resumed her hasty walk.

"I don't want to see you for the rest of the week," she hissed under her breath as she hightailed it across the damp lot.

Seeing a familiar car pulling out of its spot, she hurried into a jog and waved her arms.

"Mike!" she called, grinning when he came to a stop and rolled his window down.

The sounds of Angela, Jess, Tyler, Lauren and Eric called out to her in a friendly hello.

Mike smiled happily as she approached.

"I changed my mind," she smiled apologetically. "Is the invitation still on the table?"

Angela leaned past Mike from the back of the car. "Of course it is, silly. Get your butt in here!"

Bella pushed her way into the crowded car and pretended to ignore the scathing glare being sent her way from across the parking lot.

She had to find a way to help Jasper and she couldn't do so with Edward hovering over her.

The jam-packed car was filled to the brim with laughter and teasing and shouting.

Before heading to the movie, Mike swerved into a diner at the last second under Eric's hysterical shouting for food and proclamations that starvation was imminent.

Once seated, Angela turned and bumped her elbow against Bella's.

"I'm glad you decided to come along," she murmured, her words going unheard by the rest of the chattering group as they played with the salt shakers and gossiped.

"Yeah," Bella agreed weakly.

"Are you ok? You seem kinda… off."

"Just have a lot on my mind, y'know? Sorry."

"Nothing to worry about. We all have our crud to deal with."

Bella shared a smile with her friend then resumed her introspective thoughts.

If she could somehow get Jasper the blood he needed… but how?

Plan A… sneak into the Cullen house, because where else would he be?, and offer herself up. The only ending to that was her being sucked into a husk, good intentions or not, or she'd be turned. Neither of which she was really prepared for.

Plan B… was there even a plan B? She could kidnap someone. Force them to the Cullen's house and then… who was she kidding?

"Sick scar, dude." Eric was mooning over a slightly raised, white slash running across Mike's forearm.

"Isn't it?" The baby-faced boy looked proud of it, raising it to the light to better show it off.

The girls made the appropriate noises of disgust.

"Got it when I fell off my bike back in elementary school."

"Into what, a barrel of glass?"

"Gravel, but close to it. Yeah, six stitches and I had to get a transfusion."

"Gnarly…" Eric whispered, awe-struck.

Bella jerked as if she'd been electrocuted.

Of course. Of course! She felt brilliant, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. A transfusion.

A plan began to form in her mind. It was risky and certainly not guaranteed to even work in the first place…but if it would save Jasper's life then she would do everything she could, no matter the risk.

How strange, to be so free, so on the edge.

It was exhilarating.

***

She opened the door quietly, padding into the darkened bedroom and whispering, "Charlie…"

Her father snorted and shifted in his bed, then continued snoring away.

"Charlie," she said, this time a bit louder.

"Sng- huh? Bella? What is it?" He sat up and blearily turned on the lamp beside the bed.

"I, uh… the knife slipped. I was just making breakfast…"

"Jeses Christ, Bells!"

Her father reached forward and held his hands over the severe cut marring her forearm.

"Keep pressure on it, Bells. Hold tight, let me grab my keys."

"Ok," she nodded slowly, ignoring the sanguine liquid dripping from her elbow. Just ignore it…

But that rotten, coppery stench- she fought the gag filling her throat, closing her eyes against the dizziness.

She hadn't meant to cut so deep… oh well.

"C'mon, Bells. Let's get you to the hospital. You don't need your bag, sweetie…"

She waved his concern away and allowed him to herd her into the cruiser.

***

"Nothing to worry about, just a few stitches. Keep the bandages clean and a steady dose of advil going and she'll be fine." The once-soothing voice of Carlisle now made her want to fidget. It was disconcerting how quickly an opinion could be changed of someone. He meant well, she reminded herself.

"Thank you, Doctor," Charlie replied stiffly, most likely shaking the blonde man's hand.

Bella made sure her eyes were shut tight, breathing softly through her nose.

"Not a problem. I'd suggest letting her get a few hours of rest before bringing her home. There's breakfast being served in the cafeteria if you're hungry- it will be a while before she awakes."

Of course, Charlie could never resist breakfast. He left with Carlisle, the door swinging shut behind them and leaving only the sound of the heart monitor behind.

Bella waited a good two minutes before peeling her eyes open, wincing against the harsh fluorescent lighting.

She sat up slowly, looking down at her newly acquired wound. Thank goodness it was all wrapped up in gauze or else she might be prone to another spell of queasiness.

She had to move quickly- Charlie could put down a meal faster than most. Sliding from the bed, she took a moment to reorient herself before moving to take off the heart monitor covering her index finger, pausing in the very last moment. Wouldn't do to have the alarm blaring.

Shifting to the side as far as the tangle of chords would allow, she reached toward the outlet and yanked the monitor's plug from the wall.

Disentangling herself, she trotted across the room and grabbed up her backpack, slinging it over her gaping hospital gown.

Peering through the cracked doorway, she scanned the halls. Empty- good.

She trotted outside, her heart pounding with adrenaline. Now, where would they keep it? This door?

The man and his nurse looked up sharply.

"Oh! Sorry," she cringed, closing the door and her mind to the image of the old man receiving a sponge bath.

This one?

A broom fell forward as she opened the door. She barely caught it, pausing at the sound of approaching footsteps. She hurried inside the closet, just barely shutting the door.

A pair of nurses chatted away, pausing beside a door just opposite of her hiding spot.

Using a key card, one of the nurses unlocked it with a soft beep. They went inside, reemerging several minutes later.

They were halfway down the hall when Bella dashed across the hall, just barely catching the door before it shut.

Shelves were close to bursting with supplies, from syringes to medication. Perfect. She looked on every shelf, between every canny, dropping boxes of gauze in her haste.

Where is it, where is it… Ah… The giant fridge at the end of the room. That would make sense.

She opened it in a burst of frigid air, shivering softly. There must be hundreds of little red packets, all neatly labeled according to their type. A brief tendril of nausea raised in the back of her throat but she tamped it down. Now wasn't the time.

Unzipping her bag, she grabbed the little plastic bags and shoved them by the handful into it. He'd need a lot…

She filled the bag until she could just barely close it, frowning at the minimal reserves left in the freezer. Hopefully, no one would be needing blood this week…

If she thought about it, she was saving lives. A fair trade, in her opinion.

Stealing back to her room, she threw herself back into her bed and rearranged herself, settling her racing heart.

Ok… she had the blood…

Now how in the hell was she going to get it to him?


	7. Chapter 7

You guys… I've done it. I've finally done it.

I've published a book. It's taken me almost a year, innumerable hours of headaches, and many times of tossing my computer into the trash, but I've done it.

It's called Aphelion and you can find it on Amazon under the author name A. E. Alby. I'll put a link in my profile if you'd like to check it out. It's set in the middle ages. Cassia Faramond, a spoiled girl, is petitioned by the god of the moon to help him reclaim his throne. If you'd like to buy it, it's only $4.89! Can't even get a box of goldfish for that price! It would keep me fed while I write more fics for y'all ;)

I'd just like to thank each and every one of you for your kind words and support- it made me keep writing even when I felt particularly shitty at it, lol. It's always been a dream of mine to be published and it has finally happened. Thank you, from the very bottom of my heart.

Now, without further ado, what you really came here for ;)

***  
"Just get some rest, alright? I'll be home early."

"You don't have to do that. I'll be fine."

"Are you sure, Bells?"

"Just a little cut. I'm fine- just gonna catch up on some homework."

"If you're positive…"

"Dad."

"Alright, alright. Be good, get some sleep."

"Of course."

Bella sat back into her pillows and put on her best face of pure innocence.

Charlie gave her a stern look before finally shutting her door.

She listened intently to his footsteps as he stomped down the stairs. The moment she heard the police cruiser rattle out of the driveway, she was flinging her bed sheets away and stumbling to her closet.

Tearing out of her pajamas, she shoved herself into a plain white t-shirt and a hunter green hoodie, followed by a worn pair of denim jeans and ragged sneakers.

Lastly, she snatched her backpack full of… no, best not to think on that… and sprinted to her rusty old truck- returned by her ever faithful father- doing her absolute best to keep her mind clear of any formally laid plans.

***

But even the best laid of plans have their fallacies- even the plans that include not to plan.

Alice looked like an ethereal faerie as she stood in the road, expectantly staring down her truck. The gentle mist rising from the ground only lent to the mystical air of the petite vampire.

Bella's heart sank into her stomach. It was over. Alice would tell Edward and then she'd never see Jasper again… just the thought made her heart wince.

The sound of the truck door creaking open was startling, even to her human ears, and she nearly fainted when Alice plopped herself into the passenger seat.

"Bella," she chirped softly, wrinkling her nose and giving the backpack sat in her lap a distasteful look.

"Alice…"

"I know what you're planning."

Bella waited and when the little pixie didn't elaborate, she said, "Please don't tell him, Alice. Please. Jasper's so sick- I love Carlisle but what he's doing is wrong. I can't sit back and watch him starve that man to death, I just can't."

Alice sat back and giggled.

A brief flare of rage thrummed through her stomach. "You're laughing at me?"

Alice shrugged. "Everyone's hunting right now. I'm on baby-sitting duty. They'll be back in about two hours."

Bella felt disbelief course through her veins. "Hu… what?"

"Make it count!" Alice chirped, leaning forward and giving her a tight hug. And just like that, she vanished back into the woods.

Is this what it felt like to be in a car accident? Whip lashed and thrown around and left with an absolute confusion in which you could only utter three words? Because that's all Bella could do as she sat back into her seat and breathed, "What the fuck…"

***

Driving up to the house, she couldn't help but look every which way, just waiting for someone to pop up and ruin her carefully laid plans. But as she pulls up to the driveway, everything is silent and still.

Shutting the truck, the sudden silence made her sit back and really contemplate what she was about to do.

Carrying such a large amount of blood to a starving vampire… she was just asking to be killed, wasn't she? But his eyes… they'd been so sad, so full of suffering. She had no choice but to help. If he killed her, so be it, but she had a very strong suspicion that he would sooner die than raise a hand to her.

Gathering her backpack, she walked to the front door. Open. Oh, Alice- what had you seen? Surely the pixie would tell her if her life was in imminent danger, right? Then again, she'd been behaving so strangely, ever since Jasper was brought in by the Cullens.

Entering the home, she gripped the straps of her bag and took a deep breath. Ok. She could do this. This is for him. For him.

She started by searching upstairs. Edward's room, the study, Emmett and Rose's and Alice's room respectively.

Nothing.

Downstairs was the same story.

He was in the house, right? That's what Alice had led her to believe- it's what Edward had been so adamant about. So where the hell is he?

She's beginning to grow impatient, each second ticking by bringing her closer to having to make a quick retreat. What if she didn't find him in time? Would she have to go home? Surely the blood would go bad by then- could vampires even eat spoiled blood?

A soft rustle sounded from the floorboards. She held her breath, not daring to move a muscle.

There- again, the gentlest of rattling sounded right beneath her feet. Gasping, she fell to her knees and pressed her ear to the floor. There-! The sound was much clearer. They must have a basement!

Heart pounding a million beats per minutes, she tore through the house, ripping every door open and slamming it shut when it didn't hold her shaggy, emaciated vampire.   
And then… and then, she opened a door and there it was.

A staircase leading down into a pitch black, musty room. The basement.

Bella wavered at the foot of the stairs, waiting for her eyesight to adjust. It wouldn't do to have come this far only to bust her head open from falling down the stairs.

As she waited, she squinted into the darkness and paused before hesitantly breathing into the air, "…Jasper?"

***

"…Jasper?"

He flinched in his bindings and went rigidly still. Surely this was a dream- surely that scent wasn't truly here.

But when he raised his head, there she was, like a vision. She was perched on the stairs, squinting into the darkness, her gaze roaming right over him.

His lips part as he breathes in her gentle, unobtrusive scent, lets it coat his tongue. It's better than… than…

He breathes in deeper and, if possible, stills even more in his bindings.

Whatisthatsmellwhatisthatsmellwhatisthatsmell?

His throat is on fire, as if he swallowed a handful of burning embers. It's the most painful experience that he can recall.

Just like that, he's panting and writhing in his chains, pulling against the rattling links with all of his strength. He doesn't even budge.

Finally, he resorts to calling for her, trying to tempt her into coming closer, this girl with the gentle and intoxicating scent. He croons lowly, continuously, so that she might locate him in the darkness.

She stills when his calling reaches her.

He croons again, doing his best to sit up as straight as possible lest this female think him weak.

"Jasper?" she says again, finallyfinallyfinally taking the first few steps down the creaking wooden stairs.

With every inch she comes closer, he grows more frantic. His entire body heaves with his sharp inhales, jaw hanging open as he coats his entire mouth in the scent. Closerclosercloser just come closer!

A hidden instinct, one not often indulged, flares to life in him and he remembers how pleased females were to hear him purr. It starts off rattling in his chest, an awkward vibration that stirred in his throat but he picks up the rhythm quickly, crooning and cooing and purring for her to just come closer!

She blindly makes her way forward, so closer so close! Closer! His purring intensifies as he strains in his bonds. She's so near! Only a few more steps. Closer and closer and-

The feeling of her hand against his chest makes him shudder and pause in his symphony of calls. Her touch is unlike any other. It doesn't sting- it doesn't hurt… it feels… good… right.

"There you are," she murmurs, raising her other hand and reaching blindly for his jaw. She traces the sharp line there and he bows his head so that she might have a better reach- anything to keep her close.

He starts up his purr again, softer now that she is near.

"What have they done to you?" she wonders, horrified, as her hands trail down to his arms, finding the cruel metal manacles wrapped around his wrists. She pulled on them, rattled them, followed their lengths to the fish-eye hooks wedged into the concrete wall.

"So fucking cruel…" an unknown emotion chokes her words.

He inhales sharply and bends down lower, crooning loudly. Gods he just wants that fucking scent closer. What is it whatisitwhatisit?!

"Oh! I'm so stupid."

She stepped away and he immediately mourned the loss of her soft heat. Before he could begin calling for her again, however, she was throwing the backpack from her shoulders and unzipping it.

There… the scent wafted upwards with her movements and he felt himself growing cloudy, suspended in a misty red haze.

"Ok… I brought you some… s-some…. Anyway. I don't really know how to… give this to you? I only ask that you don't… well, just please don't hurt me, ok? Jasper? Can you hear me?"

He's gasping down air, straining forward as far as he can, shaking with his weakness and hunger.

The moment she held up the little plastic bag before his lips, he dove forward and sunk razor-sharp teeth into its surface. A pleased rumble left him as he sucked down the pure, life-giving essence. It's beautiful, it's wonderful, the fucking taste. It's unlike anything else. He can't get enough- more more moremoremoremoremore. When the packet is empty, he retracts his teeth and snarls viciously, vibrating with untamed energy.

The moment the next packet is timidly offered, he rips into it with such viciousness that the life-giving girl is spattered in the sanguine liquid. She flinches but dutifully prepares the next bag.

Nineteen packs follow in similar succession. It's amazing, the energy suddenly flooding his veins and making his very body feel electric. He finishes off the final bag and slumps forward, utterly filled for the first time in… ever?

He feels… content. Not quite safe, no, not yet, but content. And it's thanks to the gentle, wisp of a girl. When he lifts his head, a far easier feat than not even an hour ago, he can see her cheeks and sides of her neck are spattered with blood.

He pulls and one of the manacles snap like glass beneath his strength.

The girl flinches but before she can move too far, he's already got his arm wrapped around her. Hauling her forward and into his lap, he immediately sets to dragging his tongue over the stray droplets marring her perfect skin, holding her close.

She squeezes her eyes shut and goes rigidly still, digging her fingers into his arms. Her heart flutters between their chests like a delicate bird and, as he drops his head lower and licks the hollow of her throat, it stutters and picks up speed.

Another scent floods the room, heady and thick and utterly unavoidable. He stills as his nostrils quiver. This scent…

He moans softly and gently presses his teeth into her skin, just on the edge of tearing it. This scent is better than even the red liquid.

His hands ghost across her sides, up and down, reaching further down to the source of her heat. He touches her and-

She jumps like a frightened horse, flailing away from him and gasping down lungfuls of air. She shakes, holding herself, and he's not much better, panting in her scent and quivering with a strange need.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. "I-… I need to… go." She trips over her feet as she turns.

She's leaving? Already?

He begins to purr softly and when that doesn't work, he croons loudly for his female to return.

But she disappears up the stairs with one last glance his way.

… what did he do wrong?


End file.
